I was very, very angry today. Angry at myself for not being able to get pregnant right away. Angry at Baby G for leaving us in the first place. Angry at the universe for picking us to have to go through this. Angry that we didn’t start trying earlier. Angry at anyone who ever has gotten pregnant without even trying.
I know that I shouldn’t complain – that, in fact, I’m one of the lucky ones because I can get pregnant. But, I sure don’t feel lucky right now. All I feel is anger, sadness, and hopelessness…and that knitting this damn baby blanket is going to be very emotional.