Tears

Nicole & Maggie had a post about this the other day, but I had written and scheduled this before so I figured I’d still post it. 

One of my most embarrassing behaviours is the fact that I tend to tear up when frustrated or angry.

This is incredibly annoying when I’m in an argument with DH and I’m trying to be angry, but I end up crying.

It’s even worse when it happens in a work environment. I feel like it makes me look weak, like I can’t handle things. It clearly can leave a bad impression, and it can make people uncomfortable.

I don’t know how to stop it, and it drives me crazy!

I’m a very emotional person in general, and have a hard time hiding my true feelings. I find it hard to lie, even in situations where I know that I should just SHUT UP. These could be seen as strengths, but in some cases it really gets me into trouble or makes me look really bad.

Any one else like this? Anyone able to overcome it (especially the tearing-up)? Tips? Suggestions?

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Comments on: "Tears" (3)

  1. Yes, this happens to me too! And it’s really hard to disguise because my face gets red blotches when I cry so even if I manage to fight the tears, it still shows. I try to get out of the situation as quickly as possible without saying much. Take some deep breaths and say nothing. Sometimes it’s better not to say anything or “solve” anything right away and just take a time-out.

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  2. hm, I tear up when I am really angry. It’s the emotions wanting to get out (I’ve even read research that blood pressue goes down when tears come out so I think it is a safe gauge in certain people). However, like you say – it’s not wanted at work…. I focus very hard on my feelings at the time when I feel tears rising and think about a safe space (where i feel in control and not feeling these anger feelings) and then I take a few deep breaths, in through nose and out through mouth (yoga style…) and usually I can stave off the tears for a while.

    It might help for me though that I did a bunch of acting in my younger years and can cry on demand so I’ve decided that if I can do that, I should be able to hold it back. Not sure that this helps?!

    also, I’ve definetly worked on “not saying anything” but to be quiet since I have a feeling that I will go too far in “telling thr truth” and people really don’t want that.(at least not at work. And not with me being angry, I tend to want to be less nice then). Being quiet also gives an opportunity to think about something else, breathing and not crying. Of course, there have been times when this all goes out the window – feelings are feelings after all….

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    • The “not saying anything” is something I’m working on as well. In fact, I just resigned from a job, and was very (uncharacteristically) brief in my explanation for leaving. I think it was a good thing, because if I had started it could have very easily turned into a rant.

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